The relationship ended at what has been termed the attraction stage of obsession and did not continue to anxious, obsessed, and destructive. That wouldn't be like me to go there anyway.
The attraction has been a comfortable irritation. Yes, that is possibly an oxymoron. That's exactly this has been.
I wanted very much to "get this bubble burst", so I meditated on the solution. I checked in with my meditative council, and was advised to ask a Psychosynthesis colleague, one knowledgeable in clinical psychiatry. One I could also trust.
After I shared my dilemma, she considered my frame of pathological reference - the "obsession wheel", as it is called - and where I placed myself on the wheel. Then, instead of responding to that, she raised a valid question. "Which Psychosynthesis techniques would you feel most comfortable using to process this?"
Disidentification. I live that attachment, but I am more than that attachment...., etc. (exercise available upon request)
A gestalt conversation with the one who was this attached attraction. I have my say. Then sitting in the other's chair, I take on his being and say where he is with this. Back and forth until all the cards are on the table and we both have had our inner self say on the subject of his hanging around as a long played out past. I felt it all in my neck - this whole attachment has been a big pain in the neck!
A guided imagery to a new place in which the Higher Self has been accessed to facilitate a healed image of myself. freed of this illusory attraction, living in the reality of today.
I was living in a memory which had long ago died and gone to heaven. Letting go was long overdue.
The final stage of this process has been to develop a daily routine - a discipline - of paying attention to what is going on in the world today and spend a few minutes absotbing its ultimate nowness.
We all have attachments which are no longer real and no longer needed. How do you let these go?
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