My Best Exotic Marigold Hotel

the Lake at Marjorie Neal Nelson Park

During my morning mediation, I opened my heart to receiving an answer to a question that has been nagging at me since I saw the movie,the Best Exotic Marigold Hotel. The question is two-fold:

Where is my destined Best Exotic Marigold Hotel?

 and 

What do I have to offer its growth and sustainability?

This week, I have been participating virtually, 0n a program called "Hangout",  in an Institute of Cultural Affairs (ICA) archives Sojourn, held in Chicago at what has become to know as "The Greenrise". Once a global centrum for the ICA time has provided its transformation into  a social demonstration of urban environmental responsibility.  As well, it houses offices of  ICA USA.

I began working with one group and ended up working with another. Given the Divine Mystery's  ability to  place people where they are really supposed to be in order to gain information for decisions that are needed soon, I was not surprised that I ended up in a "New Religious Mode" (NRM) group.

This group was looking at this amazing work that the ICA had created in the late 60's and early 70's to determine its applicability to this century and create a new packaging if necessary.

I recently shared this NRM chart with some local colleagues, as a framework for creating questions for a story telling project, - questions that would elicit stories shared from the Heart.  This NRM group was just what I needed to reawaken a deeper resolve to let Soul breathe through Heart Space, releasing a story in the process.

At the end of the week's sojourn, windows of possibility opened in my imagination of all the different ways I could live a life of service again, even as an elder with several limitations.  

As I drifted off to sleep last night after this stimulating, reawakening week, the wide open future was dancing through my dreams.

This morning I listened for an answer and, if nothing else,  I am clear that this small village where I live is  a Best Exotic Marigold Hotel.  I have been on the right track with this story telling project and the people in our small group here in Crescent City are like those residents of  the Best Exotic Marigold Hotel. We get to discern what's happening here and decide what we can do with what we have and who we are,  to be of service in making it our great place to be alive.

I listened to the wisdom from my heart. I was reminded that I am not about recreating those NRM charts. But, most certainly they are a resource along with a rich history with the ICA globally, which I bring with me,  as I BE a  contribution to Crescent City's  bountiful Spirit.

Where is your own Best Exotic Marigold Hotel?  Who are its residents? 

An Empathic Connection is Possible

I can not count the times I have been "accused" of taking something personally.

I admit, I do take on the state of being of those around me. I feel pain that is not mine, both physically and emotionally. I have discovered I know others thoughts as if they are talking to me. I know things - facts - that I only know through the direct encounter and not any prior knowledge.

By reading Don Miguel Ruiz' The Four Agreements, I began to practice them in my own life. I began with noticing the times that I encountered the need to practice one or another of these agreements. In the case of DONT TAKE ANYTHING PERSONALLY. I began to really be aware that I would be connected in my own body, to an-other-than-myself's pain.  

Right now, my partner is having serious hip pain and I also am having this hip pain.  In my body, it hasn't been feeling like the pain is not the hip bones. It has been around them.  Yesterday, after an MRI, he got the report that it isn't his hip bones, it is his lymph nodes, which are near that part of the body.  I found this worth paying attention to regarding my own diagnostic ability.

I spent years feeling depressed and never could figure out why.  After I was divorced, I was happy and of course attributed it to being free from a really  abusive relationship.  Once I began to be aware that I have built into my being a strong propensity for an empathic connection to another, I understood that it was more a matter of taking on what I have come to know as my ex-husband's chronic depression or whatever it was that kept him so angry with me all the time. Hey, I could blame it all on my free spirit or wild right brain that kept me from really bonding with another, but that would not explain my own always depressed mood swings during those 30 years of marriageand went away within two years of changing accumulated patterns.

I have been able to use this reality, which is so strong in my being, as a spiritual guide in my career in counseling.

I am able to listen to my own body's needs, but do not feel comfortable diagnosing someone else's blocked energy. At the same time,  I know of many medical intuitives who make an empathic connection, and trust their sense of being called to this vocation to diagnose and treat a client.

I have lived with cats who know exactly where to place their bodies for a long healing purr. This leads me to believe the skill is a primal skill available to all people, should they be so drawn to awakening its potential within themselves.

An empathic connection is a deep connection with another, both physically and emotionally.It is like eing a mirror to what is happening in their bodies and emotions, but also feeling it.

Perhaps all empaths are introverts, I don't know, but I am always uncomfortable in a live group of people. I have to sort out what is mine and theirs over and over with each encounter. Needless to say, this virtual way of connecting with people is really easier to handle. But, it is not so real.

Those of us who have this skill all have to learn how to use it, to sort out and to use for the greater good. Those who feel they do not have this skill are simply not aware that they have it. 

Have you had this experience of the empathic connection?  How do you use it?

Transparency of Harley and Taca Belle.

I have been on an incredible journey with these two dogs. They hang out together and roam the neighborhoods daily.  The brown mutt is Harley and the chihuahua we call Taca Belle. She lives on the other side of the village , but walks over to meet up with Harley to spend the day.

The first encounter with this motley pair was during a morning walk with three other women. This pair of canines came from the opposite direction, surrounded us and barked while nipping at our calves and butts.  I gave them a cat treat each hoping they would go away. Instead they focused in on me, cornering me as I found my way onto a stranger's porch. Harley threatened with his barking as any good guard dog  might. The woman who lived in the house came out. I explained to her that I was trapped here, hoped she would forgive me, and the police who I had called would soon arrive.  Well, Chief Johnson finally drove up in his squad car, leaned out the window and said, "Harley, what are you up to now?" and then backed up with the dogs following him. Chief Johnson took the dogs to Harley's and informed the owner of the behavior of his little Pranksters.

On the second encounter, I was walking alone. The two dogs ran up to me, not allowing me to move from the street. I stood perfectly still, slowly dialed 911 and explained that I was being held hostage on the street by two dogs. The operator finally understood me and very soon after, because it is a very small village, Chief Johnson arrived. However, as soon as I called 911, Taca Belle moved slowly to the nearest house and sat down on the porch, giving the impression she lived there and had been there for hours.  At the same time, Harley stole slowly down the driveway of the same house, turned around and sat there with a wondering demeanor.  When he arrived, Chief Johnson first looked at me without saying a word, then we both looked at these innocent looking dogs and burst our laughing at how clever they were.  Nevertheless, Chief Johnson paid a visit to the real owner, reminding him of the leash laws.

 I also ran into the Mayor as I continued my walk and told him what was happening. He offered to go see the owner himself. He did what he said he would do.

the third encounter with these two was on a walk again, with my friends.  The two dogs came toward us from the opposite direction and walked right on past us as if we didn't exist.  Needless to say, we all laughed for a long time as we went on.

The fourth time I saw the two was on my porch. I caught them before they ate the cat food and told them in no uncertain terms were they to continue their pursuit and directed them to leave the porch. They did. I called the police, but they were long gone before he got there. While I was talking to the police, they managed to sneak back onto the porch, finish off the cat food, and beat hell into the bushes.  This time, I went to see the owner myself.  I have not seen the two dogs anywhere  since that visit.

Why I have been so deeply addressed by these encounters with these dogs is a question I was drawn to answer. I was annoyed that these dogs would be running loose. I was impressed with the support I received from the police and with their light-hearted but serious response.  That the dogs knew enough to go through the routine of curbing an intruder (as if the streets were their domain) and were smart enough to try to look innocent when they realized their mistake, really placed me in empathy's squeeze. When they were food hunting, I really felt their primal drive to survive and felt called to solve this problem humanely.

Dogs, like humans, get confused sometimes. Sometimes we claim space as our domain which is not ours. Sometimes we catch ourselves in old patterns which no longer serve our better judgment and we opt to attempt to cover our mistakes with an aura of innocence. Sometimes, we hunger for food or love and nothing will stop us from getting those needs met.

I am considering writing a children's book about Harley and Taca Belle. Their story is transparent to what most of us experience at any given time.

Which encounters have affected your life into a place of empathy in a way that draws you into telling the story?