A Healing Perspective

Taken b  y Kurt Rolfes in one of the Buddha's gardens during our pilgrimage in India.

In my previous blog entry, I wrote the interpretation of a life experience from a psychoanalytic perspective.  This was just the beginning of a healing process. I consider this first step an awareness of suffering of all the agents involved in a traumatic experience. But, it is not a deep empathic understanding of my own suffering or the suffering of the others involved.

I have to say that rereading that last blog, my response is "So what, Has anything really changed?"  The answer is, "No". I still have resentment and so does everyone else.  The reasons for the resentment are displaced, not yet named, and therefore, not really in a position to  release it all to its highest good.

I might say, the mindfulness phase of processing grief is accomplished and half the data has been collected. Now,  in order for the healing to continue, the Soul now creates the dance.

No one person is to be blamed. No one circumstance can be blamed. No one action can be blamed.  The whole thing happened because all  our unique histories of living came to a place where the inevitable occurred. There were no other options, given the ability of all involved to function under the circumstances.

Things happen because they happen. People respond the way they do because that is who they are at that time. Outcomes are the outcomes they are because that is the way the course of history went. We all did what we did, said what we said, felt what we felt at the time. Dust settled, and here we all are. The past cannot be changed, nor does it have any reason to do so. It is what it is.

So here we are. I don't know where the rest of them are at with all  this, but that is not my responsibility.. I have only myself to heal, so what does this mean for me?

I dive deep within my heart and ask the Divine Wisdom, which abides at Heart's Center, "How do I proceed?".

From this perspective, I learn the lesson the trauma and its accompanying events have taught me. I envision how I will conduct myself from this moment onward, determined to live as a free agent, mindful of the effect of my actions on others. I embrace the resentment I still carry and release its power over me.  I acknowledge my hypersensitive intuition and direct it toward understanding that  I am not here to control how others behave, only how I dance the healing dance.

The next time I met face to face with those I was holding this grudge, I greeted each with an open heart. It was an opportunity for each to either also let the past go and embrace the peaceful coexistence of this encounter OR continue judging me for not fitting their image of what they would have me be.  Both happened.

The difference is, that  whether the response was collegial or adversarial, it did not affect my decision to be alive and happy to be so right now.

I am so grateful for all that is. Life is a miracle and so is each person alive today.  I choose to bow to the gift within each encounter.

When has acknowledging your own suffering and embracing its gift, been like beholding the abundant beauty of a rose that you have planted in your own garden?